One of the best things about the book blogging community is the diverse range of opinions. No two reviews are the same, with bloggers all having varying pros and cons when it comes to books. And that, of course, includes the classics. Even they are not immune to some scathing (or just downright funny) one star reviews. Here I have compiled 10 1-star reviews from around the Internet; all you need to do is tell me which classic (or at least modern classic in some cases) book they are talking about.
1. ‘You may have seen the movie ‘Troy’ with Brad Pitt as Achilles, but it is quite different than the book’.
2. ‘It was just some ramblings written down by a crazy woman, with some sex in the middle’.
3. ‘Weird plotless story whose main character has no life but to be the gateway to that of others. Everyone cheats on everyone and in the end nobody ends up happy and the audience doesn’t even end up with a moral to hold on to and justify they waste of time and money they just spent’.
4. ‘I feel so sorry for these privileged, middle-class, white teenagers’.
5. ‘Maybe this was ahead of it’s time, at it’s time. I thought classics were supposed to hold their value, but this just doesn’t. Yeah, yeah Big Brother this, Big Brother that, watch out for the thought police, do your exercises in front of the telescreens…blah blah blah’.
6. ‘A book that seems like it is going somewhere good for the first half, and then gets bogged down in Russian philosophical musings. Just when you think its out of the depressing musings and going to get on with where it was headed it has an anti-climactic resolution which should be the end. Instead of ending the book at the natural place it goes on to repeat most of the plot in a very boring court room drama which takes up at least a fourth of the book’.
7. ‘First off, there was far too much incest in the book, no one likes to hear about incest’.
8. ‘How can anybody like this book? Whoever said this is the best classic ever written must be truly brain-dead. What could be enjoyable about a book that primarily consists of a guide on:
a) how to cut grass,
b) how to hunt bear, and
c) how to abandon your own kid for a gigolo.
If I wanted all that stuff I would have read Farmers Almanac’.
9. ‘Unfortunately I had to read this book for my American Literature class. It went on and on and on about absolutely nothing! Yes Mr Steinbeck is very descriptive, but he goes completely overboard in almost every chapter. I mean, does it really take a whole chapter to describe a turtle!’
10. ‘Medieval Borat’.
Enjoy and let me know how you do!
Answers for Round 6
1. TS Eliot (The Love Song of J Alfred Prufrock)
2. Samuel Taylor Coleridge (The Rime of the Ancient Mariner)
3. Christina Rossetti (Goblin Market)
4. Seamus Heaney (Blackberry-Picking)
5. Sylvia Plath (Lady Lazarus)
6. Robert Browning (My Last Duchess)
7. Percy Bysshe Shelley (Ozymandias)
8. Carol Ann Duffy (Mrs Darwin)
9. Maya Angelou (Caged Bird)
10. William Shakespeare (Sonnet 18)